Stress, doubt, pressure.
These are part of everyday life for many football referees, but they become especially intense the moment a mistake occurs – even if it was inevitable. As the football season nears its end, referees face additional pressure due to the large number of high-stakes matches. Such situations often trigger a flood of thoughts.
This article takes a slightly different approach from previous ones. Below, I present a short case study of a referee dealing with a mistake, followed by a psychological perspective supporting mental recovery.
Case Study: Michał, 26 – Referee
It’s Saturday, one of the final rounds of the season. A young referee is assigned to a crucial relegation match. Expectations are high due to his promising performance throughout the year.
The first half goes smoothly – Michał makes correct decisions and leaves the pitch at halftime confident and composed.
However, in the second half, the game changes. More complex situations arise, and in the 80th minute, Michał makes a critical mistake – he fails to award a clear penalty. Even before the final whistle, he knows it will be widely discussed.
In the dressing room, frustration kicks in; he keeps replaying the moment in his mind: “How could I miss that?”
The next day, he struggles to focus, feels demotivated, and even considers quitting refereeing. The feeling spills into his personal and professional life. He concludes that his entire season was wasted because of that one decision.
Although the assessor confirms the error, Michał still receives a positive evaluation overall.
Mistakes as a Part of Success
Michał’s story may resonate with many referees who have faced similar experiences in their officiating journey. Every referee knows that decision-making often depends on positioning. In this case, the positioning was suboptimal, which led to the mistake.
The first step toward changing one’s mental perspective is psychoeducation about making mistakes.
When asking young athletes, “What is the opposite of a mistake?”, the most common answer is “success.”
However, that’s not entirely true. A few simple statements clarify what success really consists of – particularly in the context of refereeing:
- Mistakes, setbacks, and failures are components of success.
- The opposite of success is inactivity, dullness, and acceptance of mediocrity – choosing not to officiate (when you have the chance) can itself be seen as a mistake.
- Every action carries a risk of failure – even going shopping with your family.
- Every decision leads to small wins and losses – by analyzing his mistake and drawing conclusions, Michał achieves a small personal victory.
Thinking Traps After a Mistake
These four points lead us to the next mental traps we tend to fall into:
- Downplaying the situation – every referee wants to perform well, so saying “It’s fine, nothing happened…” won’t help at all.
- Minimizing the importance of the event – when assigned to a decisive relegation match, telling yourself “I didn’t really care about it…” is simply untrue.
Steps Toward Regaining Mental Balance
Moving on to practical steps, here are a few actions worth taking to restore mental stability:
- Drop the anchor – staying stuck in a thought loop can be overwhelming. Try the following steps:
- A – Acknowledge your thoughts and emotions (there’s sadness, that’s my anger, these are thoughts of failure)
- C – Connect with your body (move, stretch, stand tall, feel your feet on the ground)
- E – Engage with the external world (where are you right now, what do you see, hear, smell, what five green objects can you notice?)
- Acceptance – self-talk:
- This emotion is normal; it’s a natural reaction to a difficult situation.
- Emotions are like the weather, and I am the sky.
- Emotions are like waves: they rise, peak, and fall.
- At this moment, this emotion is intense, but it will pass with time.
- I have space for this feeling; no matter how big it gets, it cannot be bigger than me. I want to make room for it, even if I dislike it.
- This emotion is painful, but it cannot physically harm me; I don’t have to fight it or run away from it.
- I don’t have to let this feeling control me; I can make space for it and still choose to act according to my values.
- Like all emotions, this one will come, stay, and go in its own time. I don’t have to fight it or escape from it.
- Drop the anchor and ride out the storm.
- Analysis and reflection – after creating mental distance and accepting your emotions, you can focus on technical aspects of refereeing. The best way to learn is to analyze your own match and identify areas for improvement.
These are just three elements that can help a referee in the short term. However, sports psychology is a process, sometimes requiring many more steps.
Making Mistakes Is Part of Being a Referee
How we handle them defines those who maintain mental stability. Sports psychology doesn’t offer ready-made recipes, but it helps guide referees toward constructive actions, even in the face of adversity.
In the next article, I will explore another topic related to sports psychology in refereeing.
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References
- Pielas, T. (2025). ACT in Sport – Module 1 [online ACT course]. Karty Sportowca.
- Pielas, T. (2025). ACT in Sport – Module 3 [online ACT course]. Karty Sportowca.
- Więcław, G. (2017). Ile sił w głowie. Psychologiczny niezbędnik biegacza. Athlete Publishing.
- Harris, R. (2024). Understanding ACT: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in Practice (A. Sawicka-Chrapkowicz, Trans.). Gdańskie Wydawnictwo Psychologiczne. (Original work published 2009)

